So I've been tasked with writing a press release trying to alert the local news stations/paper to a protest we plan on having against the NDAA. Here is what I have so far
QuoteFEBURARY 3RD PROTEST AGAINST FLORIDA'S SENATORS SUPPORT OF THE NDAA
Libertarian Party, Occupy Jacksonville, Oathkeepers, and others come together to protest the indefinite detention of American citizens
Jacksonville, FL (Jan. 27th, 2012) - On February 3rd, multiple groups and concerned citizens will descend upon the offices of Congressional officials to protest the recently passed National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA.). The act, specifically sections 1021 and 1022, would potentially allow for the indefinite detention of American citizens without the right to due process.
Locally, this protest has been spear headed by groups such as the Libertarian Party of Duval County, Occupy Jacksonville, and Oathkeepers. The protest will be centered on Marco Rubio's Jacksonville office on Prudential Drive from approximately Noon until 7pm EST.
Marco Rubio's office was chosen because he voted in favor of the NDAA despite being elected on a platform of smaller government.
Quote from: FSBlueApocalypse on January 24, 2012, 02:49:42 PM
So I've been tasked with writing a press release trying to alert the local news stations/paper to a protest we plan on having against the NDAA. Here is what I have so far
I'm not a journalist, but if I may:
a more interesting and detailed style is in order-within the limits of accuracy and journalistic integrity. you may, for example, want to elaborate on why people are against this (or in favor). you need to engage as many readers as you can on this issue. It will better raise awareness on the rally, and perhaps it will be slightly more successful if well executed as an article.
EDIT: no, I'm not implying you have a bad article. just providing some input.